Yu know how it's said that "the people yu surround yourself with tells alot about yu" ? , well i'm a bit baffled on it's credibility. I'm pretty intelligent myself & quiet most times. I can provide intelligent conversation if i'm with a crowd who can provide it back, but somehow i always end up with the loud mouth girl close by. I mean, yes - I conversate with her bechus she is quite humorous, yet she indulges in the term "ghetto". She admits that she is "ghetto" when she wants to be which seems as if it's ALL the time. Your typical society would assume I'm loud & craving attention due to her actions & my presence to her..but actually, my crowd of choice doesn't influence me at all.
Does your "crowd" make/influence your ways?
so yesterday ; she apologized for hurting me .
yes ; dhet's wht i wanted but shxt still doesnt feel right . maybe i'm jzt being stingy , but eh . now we're back on this " let's start over " again . this is the third time in counting .
eh , for now . it's good , we're friends & all - no true emotions are intact for her on my behalf , jzt that of a friend for the best , i wonder the outcome on this .
*ps : this is a somewhat continuing from a former blog labeled " & then wht " .
first & far most , i usually don't associate w. guys longer then 10 minutes ; phone wise , face to face wise , etc .
but unfortunately , that changed yesterday . i was having this conversation with this guy, jzt bechus he's madd cool and wht not . i mean , & it wasn't like one of those " man he's bugging me " type conversations, he is madd intelligent so it was pretty interesting . to the main point here tho, like we started discussing females & their preference mainly . most females , i did say most think the ideal type is the light - skinned , long haired , name brand wearing type , like the ones who are jzt the epitome of " sexy " , guys & " studs " since i'm including homosexual & bisexual women preference mostly too . so like, it got to that & the topic of most " gorgeous " women wouldn't give the one's outside of that " ideal person " the time of day . so like the guy & i are cuties , not like sexy and so on but we have personalities to die for , not all name brand shxt but not cheap shxt neither, but most girls would kind of look over us bechus the simple fact of we're not tip top " sexy " . i mean , we can pull those females , but only like after they've talked to us some & fell for our personality outside of their generalized looks .
this was random , but it " faced " my point . looks shouldn't dominate , although of course it still should be considered . like i wouldn't date an unattractive person simply bechus they have a nice personality bechus if i'm not attracted , wht's the use ?
i once seen a quy convicted life for attempt of murder ; see - he didn't know how to leave with a clean slate . he had qiven her his all ; packaged into his beinq . she had the lock to his sanity ; the keyy to his everythinq . she cradle'd his life in the palms of her hands ; often letting it slip between her fingers - these were those times they had off & on ; your typical break-ups & make-ups . * she never once let it hit the qround until now ; this day she decides dhet she dosent want this ownaqe of him . * her words cutting deeper than her actions - " i still love yu ; forever will ; but i'm not at peace with [ us ) ; i'm leavinq - sry . " - he didn't understand how to accept this . his thouqhts were on froze ; ice box'd to a sudden death . his next steps were of no thouqht ; the qun set waitinq . he placed it in his hand ; his index finqer triqqer'd the qun so lovely - but somehow ; he missed . his wife ran to a neiqhbor's - dialed the police & they were there less then five minutes. where they found him sitting calmy ; caressing the gun he held . [ ... ) - see ; this man was convicted lifee because he attempt'd to take [ her ) life ; but she had already taken his emotionally over the years & was convicted nothinq . - are we attempt murderers for a common break-up ; are we mass murderers of the emotional kill ?
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